NEXT TIME, HARVESTER
One fine fall day, Farmer Gray is walking by Farmer Jones’s barn, and through a gap in the door, he sees Farmer Jones doing a slow striptease in front on an old red John Deere tractor. Buttocks clenched, Farmer Jones slowly spins around, gently slides off the right strap of his overalls, and then the left. He hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, he lets his overalls fall down to his hips revealing a torn plaid shirt. Grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart and reveals his stained T-shirt. With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay. Framer Gray rushes in and yells, “What the hell are you doing, Jones?” “Whoa there, Gray, you just scared the living shit out of me!” exclaims Farmer Jones. Listen Gray, let me explain. Me and the ol’ lady, we’ve been havin’ some trouble in bed, and our minister he told me I had to do somethin’ sexy to a tractor.”
What’s so funny about this? I’m not going to go into a lot of detail about this joke due to a lack of time and space. But there are a couple of things you need to know. First of all, John Deere is a well-known manufacturer of farm equipment, especially tractors. Tractors are powerful farm vehicles with very large rear wheels and they are used to haul around plows and other farm equipment. Basically, you can’t be a farmer without one. The other thing you need to know is the pun. Jones is so fixated on his farm that he thought the minister told him to do something sexy to a tractor. In reality the minister told him to do something sexy to attract HER, meaning his wife! Of course, if Jones is really that dumb then he’ll probably have more luck with the cows and the goats. And THAT’s what’s so funny!
This joke has been slightly modified from the one appearing in the book The Joker by Andrew Hudgins
Listen to my audioboo: https://audioboo.fm/boos/1591834-next-time-harvester
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